It’s a defense mechanism to reject someone you feel rejected by. But if you’re feeling rejected by the person you’re in a relationship with you need to resist that instinct and communicate how you’re feeling. You need to find out what you don’t know. We tend to take everything personally …
What is my ex doing without me this weekend? Is he or she with someone else? Does s/he even miss me? Those kind of thoughts are one of the hardest parts of a breakup — but you can survive, and even be happy if you choose to think about better things, and do …
Are you waiting for something to happen that is out of your control? Like for your ex to come back, to get married, or move forward? That’s being in limbo, and limbo sucks. Take your power back. Make a strong choice that you want something better. Take action and/or walk …
Do you have a friend that you don’t really like but you stay friends with anyway? The very nature of the word “frenemy” which is a merging of the completely opposite words “friend” and “enemy” should tell you it’s not a good relationship. But frenemies are more than just bad …
Has everyone you dated been unavailable to you in one way or another? They may seem available in some ways but are they also long distance, emotionally closed, won’t commit completely, or married to someone else? Be really honest with yourself and answer the following 3 questions. How available is this guy …
Be Careful What You Wish For If you’re pining for your ex and hoping to reunite, the best way to feel better is to get over him or her by deciding you don’t want them back. Ask yourself if it was honestly a good relationship for you. I’m not talking about in the beginning when you didn’t REALLY …
Hurting someone’s feelings is never easy but if you want to end your relationship it’s the compassionate thing to do. In fact, the more final you can be the better. People hear what they want to hear. If you try to sugar coat the breakup your soon-to-be ex will focus …
Too many people are afraid to tell their partner their wants, needs, and desires because they don’t want to destroy their relationship. But keeping them to yourself will cause other problems and usually end it anyway. Several of my male clients have all told me the same thing. “The best …
Are your childhood issues ruining your relationships? If so, I have to tell you that’s your fault, not your parents. But that’s good news! Because you have the power to stop allowing your demons to sabotage your chance at true love. Stop blaming your parents and start taking action to improve …
If you have broken up with someone who is not letting go and won’t stop contacting you, the best way to make your ex leave you alone is to send him/her a very clear message that you are done. As a breakup coach, most of my clients come to me …
Blaming someone for the ways they hurt you or pointing out what they did wrong only makes you look bad. It certainly does not endear them to you. Playing the victim will never get you what you want, just the opposite. The best way to get someone to do what …
If you know the person you’re dating is crazy about you but you also know you don’t want a future with her than the compassionate thing to do is end it and stop wasting her time. Hurting someone a little now is better than devastating them later. The old, “It’s …
Have you ever had your heart broken? I believe that is a defining question. Post-heartbreak, many of my clients experiencing it for the first time have had epiphanies. All of a sudden, they felt sorry for how they behaved or for things they had said to past lovers before they …
Finding the love of your life, your one soul mate, can feel like looking for a needle in a haystack. So when you deeply connect with someone it’s extremely hard to let go if it doesn’t work out. But if you decide to think that was your only chance at …
Clients frequently ask me, “Should I be friends with my ex?” Well. if you were to be completely honest with yourself, I think you would know that you do not want to be friends with your ex. What you want is to keep him or her in your life because …
